Wednesday, February 29, 2012

You gotta know when to hold it

KIC isn't always a reliable source. She's selective about what she shares (see: My little spy), but the when is always sketchy and it's usually only what she wants to share, not what you want to know. I'm sure, in time, we'll be getting more details than we ever wanted to know, but until then, I'm content with little gems like this.

KIC: "My friend, XXX, had an askident. He pooped on the pwaygwound!"
Me: "He did?!?!"
KIC: "Yeah, he did! AND! XXX XXXX stepped in it!" (this is confirmed by the teacher double-bagging the unfortunate soles...haha! See what I did there?)
Me: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhh mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. I'm sure your friend XXX will be okay."

At this point, I'd like to mention that the school served the following throughout the course of the day:
- Blueberry muffins
- Yams
- Baked Apples
- Pineapples

If I had all that in the course of a day, I might be pooping on the playground too. Also, I'd like to learn some lessons from XXX. He apparently pooped while ON THE GO! That is TALENT!

Back to my conversation with KIC. As we walked down the steps to leave school, we noticed some crackers on the steps that had been ground into the tread.

KIC: "Someone spilled their food!"
Me: "It's okay. Since I'm sure it wasn't you, we'll be okay."
KIC: "Yeah, it wasn't me! You know what, Mommy? I was a good girl. I kept my poop in my bottom!"
Me (stifling a laugh): "Yes, baby, you did keep your poop in your bottom."

Can you list that as a resume skill? Knowing when to hold your poop? Cuz if so, KIC's got that particular talent DOWN and isn't afraid to tell you about it.

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